Sage Advice for All Successful Salesmen!

Posted by Diane on Jan 11, 2012


“Little Girlie, I wish I could teach you everything I know about life.  But, unfortunately, you have to go out into the world and experience it all for yourself.”  This heartfelt morsel was taught to our Mother by her Father, when she was a little girl, back in the 1920’s.  Then, this ageless gem was passed on to me, just as it was presented to her.  Over and over, when our Mother saw me challenged by the many complex experiences of life, she would repeat these exact words to me.  Then, just as her father did, she did her best to lovingly teach me what she thought that could help me.

Now it is my delight to take my family’s wise heirloom and pass it on to each and every one of you.   And I am going to make a serious attempt to cut some time off your learning curve and help you find some user-friendly shortcuts and “tools” for gathering your life lessons.   Being the world is more chaotic and moving  faster than ever, I believe that life lessons need to be learned even quicker that I learned them. So, let’s dig in and see if I can be of any help!

(And just for your information, I’m going to start a series of articles from this Introduction I am initiating with you, today.  There will be many more life lesson posts filled with this kind of connecting, mentoring, and teaching, to follow.)  

Old (and new) sayings are wonderful!  They are rich in wisdom and provoke thought and change.  Let’s start with one and see where it takes us.  My son, Brian, just shared a new insight that he discovered for himself.  He is 35 years old and he is a high school teacher.  This is what he had to say:   

“Mom, I have had to learn that I have full control of my actions,  but I have absolutely no control of the consequences.”

So what does Brian’s message mean to you?  I take it to say:  There are only two things in life that we have any control of.  One is our Behavior and Actions.  And the other is our Attitude.  Beyond that, we have control of absolutely, nothing.  So, if we leave our random choice of actions and behaviors up to the mercy of our consequences we might be in real trouble and not be too pleased with the outcome.

If you’re feeling pleased with most or all of the consequences for your behaviors, actions, and attitudes in your life, you are already well on the right tract.  You may not even need to read any further.   However, if you’re not feeling completely satisfied with your results, there’re ways to greatly improve your consequences.  But, you’re going to have to dig in and do some serious soul searching and dedicated work on yourself!  For, in this fast-paced world we’re living in today, nobody’s going to save you – at least NOT for very long!

Let’s see if I can give you some simple, easy-to-follow steps to get you started:

1. Find a few precious minutes to be alone and be quiet with yourself.

2. Listen to your thoughts, listen to your thinking.

3. Get real – get truthful – with yourself!

4. Listen to what your heart has to say to you. Is your “thinking,” positive and up-lifting – or is it muddled with some “stink’n – think’n? Yes, I thought so.

5. So, let’s see what we can do about that:

6. Take a clean sheet of paper and draw a line down the middle of the page. At the top of one side of the page, write, “Everything I feel good about.” On the other side, “Everything, I don’t feel good about.”

7. Then start writing as many things that you do feel good about. Really put your heart into this work and keep writing. When you feel like you have exhausted your “Good” side, dig into the “Bad” side. And be diligently and brutally honest here, too.

8. When fully done with the “Bad” side, go back to the “Good” side. Take a few deep breaths and really search your heart for some more good stuff. Please trust me and reach deeply inside yourself because there is always something more you can add to this side!

9. Pat yourself on the back for taking the time and heart to do this assignment. But, you are not finished.

10. Go back to the “Bad” side and pick just one item you put on that list.

11. Now ask yourself, “Do I have any control or influence for my negative entry?”

12. Let’s make an example: “I hate how I feel inside myself when I make my sales calls.”

OK.  What is it that you really hate about making that sales call.  Let’s ask some questions.

a) Do I secretly dislike the clothes I am wearing for the appointment? 

b) Do I dislike the constant frown I wear on my face in my sales appointments?

c) Do I feel like I am being scrutinized and judged by my prospects?

d) Do I dislike what my “inner voice” is saying to me when I attempt to close the sale?

e) Do I feel like a failure – that, I know that I’m not going to get this sale?

So now, let’s analyze what my true issues are from this example.  Remember, we just talked about the only two things we have control of – our behavior and our attitude.  Let’s see if these five issues are due to my own doing, or the fault of others, that is creating my negative results?

a) Do I secretly dislike the clothes I am wearing for the appointment?  (Behavior or action – I have physical control of this and I can change it!)

b) Do I dislike the constant frown I wear on my face in my sales appointments?  (I have physical and emotional control of the look on my face – I can change that too!)

c) Do I feel like I am being scrutinized and judged by my prospects?  (This is my perception and I have the internal power and ability to reconstruct a much more positive feeling about who I am. People will see me as I see myself.  If I change my “inner fine-tuning, others will see me accordingly.)

d) Do I dislike what my “inner voice” is saying to me when I attempt to close the sale?  (I’m truly the only person that has control of this voice. If I don’t like what its saying, I can reprogram the tapes. When negative thoughts come into my head, I can retort back with positive affirmations. I have full control of myself to do so!)

e) Do I feel like a failure – that, I know that I’m not going to get the sale?  (Another attitude issue: Your attitude and belief about yourself has more control your outcomes in life, than anything else.  The universe answers to the “Call of your song.” And you have full control of the tune you are playing!) 

From this exercise, you can now dissect any negative thought or behavior you struggle with.  You will be able to turn it around into something positive and constructive.  And I will be giving you many tools and practices to help you.  In the meantime, just remember, “Rome was not built in a day.”  

And, from this one very simple example, I hope you are able to see how much control you really do have to own your success in your life!  Of course, I believe that wisdom comes from experience and age.   But more importantly, it comes from your willing spirit to open yourself up to good honest self-awareness and unlimited enlightenment that the world gifts to you each and every single day.  Then, you must seek good mentoring to help you digest your life lessons and guide you.  And that is what we have just started to do together today.

l would love for you to offer a topic we can dissect together.  I am here for you!



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